Overcoming my 2021 crisis

I love to see people’s reactions when I say I’m in sourcing. 

“That’s boring!” 

“I bet you have no issues to deal with.”

And the sarcasm continues. Following 2020, there were factors that contributed to the global supply chain crisis. Long story short, factories were closing because of new COVID policies but the demand for items were increasing. 

Looking back on my posts, it occurred to me that I had not posted anything since the end of 2020. Makes sense in hindsight. 2021 was a rough year for me: personally and professionally. If I could pick one year to do over again in my life, it would be 2021. But you don’t get do-overs. You have to pick up whatever pieces you have left and move forward. You have to know how to recognize and learn from your mistakes so you don’t repeat them again. 

It is painful. But it would be even more painful to cut through an open wound. 

LISTEN 

Professionally, I was tasked with leading an SAP implementation for my function for our site. We were supposed to backfill my position but it didn’t work so well. I ended up doing two full-time jobs. Personally, I was invincible. I can take care of my family and even grow it. My husband disagreed. 

Or at least that’s how I saw it in the midst of things. He didn’t really disagree but he saw a reality that consumed me beyond belief. I could barely keep up with being present with my current loved ones since I was working 60+ hours per week. I heard him saying I was incapable and it triggered a lot of heartache, unnecessary at times. 

If I had I only listened to what he was saying or trying to understand what he saw, I would’ve realized how unbalanced my life was. Unbalanced because the weight of work held me down. 

SEE 

I needed to open my eyes. It’s not easy to stop in your day to see what you’re doing or not doing. But if I had only stepped out of my self (so to speak), I would’ve seen my actions. 

I would’ve seen myself working on my laptop during playtime in my daughters room. I would’ve seen myself choosing to do some laundry versus sitting and watching a 20 min show with my husband. I would’ve seen myself talk to people with an attitude who was only trying to be hospitable. 

When things are tough, which they constantly can be in todays supply chain World, I tend to stop and do a sanity check. How is my behavior? Where are my priorities? This helps me correct my behavior before it harms myself or others around me. 

SPEAK UP 

This one was probably my biggest lesson from 2021. I even put it in my employee review. Pre-2022 Tima would take it all on. Extra project, sure! Ballet practice, of course. Favorite home cooked meal, priority.  That new supplier line down issue, who else? 

But now I ask for help. It scarred my ego the first few times I had to stop and say “I can’t do this right now” or “if it’s needed, what can I stop working on?”  Personally, reaching out to my husband for support and even five year old daughter was a test of my humility. 

There are only so many hours in the day so why aren’t we more keen on how it’s spent? 

I can’t turn back time. I can only make the best of time I have. It’s definitely hard to listen to feedback when the sound of a category 5 hurricane is escalating beside you. 

It’s hard to see who you have become or who you are hurting when there are thousands of assignments piling up on your desk. 

Just when you think you’ve become a superhuman superhero, it’s definitely hard to stop and say “I need help.” 

The global supply chain crisis is here to stay for at least another two years. My family won’t wait on the sidelines much longer so balancing my life is even more important now than ever. 

It’s critical for me to listen to them, see myself and speak up. A line down costs a company thousands of dollars or even millions, depending on how or where the backlog is. But the cost of losing what matters most to you is incalculable. Prevent yourself from getting to that point. 

Throwing Out My Ego

Thinking of having a baby in the near future? I was given advice. The warnings. The benefits. But what most people don't talk about (maybe because they think they're out of line) is how quickly your ego gets thrown out the window.

Baby G was born on February 28, 2017 at 3:22pm. My pregnancy was on the difficult side with all day sickness from week six to 39 and contractions starting from week 28.

"But once you hold her in your arms and look into her eyes, it'll be worth it." <crickets chirping> Yes I love my daughter and wouldn't trade her for anything but I'm still recovering from the last 11 months.

I do, however, recall other comments like "you will learn to be a better leader in the workplace when you become a parent" and I'm starting to see why, hoping it holds true.

Create the Plan

I like to say I bring results and am quite productive at work and at home. It's amazing however how productive you are when you have a 40 week clock ticking.

At work I identified all the things I was leading. Working with my manager, we identified what was important and what could wait based on business needs. But what helped me get through it all was to avoid distraction.

Being at the company for almost seven years now, people know they can rely on me. So saying "no" was important now more than ever. And I learned that it was okay to say no and describe that it was based on the priorities. If there was a debate on the priority, it was resolved by putting all the cards on table and looking for the highest number.

It helps to know what needs to be done now and what needs to wait. And what's more crucial is your recovery plan. Who will do what in your absence or what will be done when something goes wrong?

I would rather take that ounce of prevention rather than the pound of reaction. Know what's ahead even when you don't know and have a plan of attack ready.

Take Control

I may have spoken about control in the past but it doesn't hurt to hit the replay button. I couldn't help waking up at five every day with the worst nauseating feeling during my pregnancy. Every time I think something would work to prevent the runs to the restroom, it no longer helped by the following week.

So I told myself to adapt. From five to eight in the morning, then noon and sometimes three to six in the evening, I may be sick. I couldn't control the sickness from happening no matter how many times I changed my diet or tried medicine my doctor prescribed. But I could control how I reacted to it.

Too often, we invest in the things we can't control. We nag about what the universe has or hasn't given us. In order to achieve results, we need to keep moving forward and we do so by analyzing what's within our control in order to succeed.

Be Humble

This one has always been the hardest for me. But when I do look into my daughter's eyes, nothing else seems to matter in that moment. She is looking to be for love, care, food and comfort. I put her needs before mine regardless of the situation. And when I can't anymore, I am willing to hand her to her father so I can rest and recharge. That was not easy in the beginning.

I am the kind of person who does everything at once and doesn't usually ask for help. When you have a fragile human being in your arms, it can be dangerous to try and do it all.

And this got me thinking- how many times did I work more than 60hrs/week? How were my decision making skills? How was my attitude towards my team? My family.

Pride can get you in trouble. Just recently, I let my guard down. I broke down and asked for help. I stopped worrying about how I would be viewed and didn't care if anyone was keeping score, which no one wasn't.

I started to listen more to what my daughter was saying (through her facial and mouth expressions and different cries); what my husband wasn't saying through his gestures of feeding the baby or rubbing my back randomly; and what my body was telling me through the aches and pains.

It's still difficult and with her growing cycles, there will be different phases of difficult but I at least lowered the expectations and know when and how to ask for help.

My daughter is just over a month now and she's slowly recovering from her low birth weight and thankfully that was the only consequence of a risk we learned about in the second trimester.

She will start to walk and talk before I am able to publish this post. So I hope to carry this message with me through her teething phase, her kindergarten hurdles, her college acceptance essays and her final touches of her dissertation (oh right, I said low expectations before huh?)

But I also hope to think of this time when I take on that next big project or interview for a manager position.

Our pride can cloud our judgment and distract us from focusing on what's important. Multitasking can be productive but I've learned the time spent feeding my daughter for 20-40 minutes a sitting, cannot be replaced. It's crucial to her health, wellbeing and aura.

If you can see the result ahead of you, then that is half the battle of achieving it. So don't be afraid to breath and be vulnerable why marking your path. If you're persistent enough, you'll succeed, even if you have to change diapers six times between start to finish. Every moment counts in achieving the end result, which includes bonding with your baby or even your team.

Reflect Now, Not Later

True leaders constantly self-reflect in order to better themselves. There are people who do this earlier in their careers and some closer to retirement. When observing my own habits and why at times I can be closed-off, it stems from not wanting to accept the harsh reality of what truly happened. 

Unfortunately, the denial stages can exponentially get worse. But even when you stop the bleeding, the cut still hurts. 

Few weeks ago, the world was struck by Adelle's new song "Hello." She moves back home and reminisces on a relationship, that she walked away from. Now, years later, she's looking to re-open what was left unsaid for many years. 

How does this relate to leadership?  "Time Heals." 

Over time, we're told that it 'gets better.' In leadership, we make tough decisions that we learn how to keep from getting under our skin. Even in my short five year career span, I have developed better insight on what battles to fight and which to walk away from. 

The experiences here help us grow enough to not repeat the events, at least not drastically. Plus, as we grow older, we tend to gain humility. Our egos start to shrink and that opens the door to "the other side" to accept what we did right and more importantly what we did wrong. 

Every day, we make choices and some of those lead to regret. In a leadership role, you need to take risks in order to go far but recognize that failure could be around the corner. 

The other day I captured three scary points about being an adult and realizing how many mistakes we've made, is one that shakes me the most. I want to live life to the fullest but not at the expense of others. 

So, how can you live a life where you don't reach a point trying to call someone 1000 times to apologize? 

First, stop and ask yourself- will this matter in 1, 5 or 10 years? What will matter? 

Second, don't be a afraid to self-reflect. It is always easier to have a conversation one day or one week later, but anything more than that holds no value. 

Lastly, be emotionally intelligent. There are a lot people investing in EQ because it works. As the industry migrated from management to leadership, self and social awareness make up the foundation of that transition. 

Adelle's song was a love story gone terribly wrong. Wounds that never healed and apologies never accepted. But as you create your legacy, realize, it's only a legacy if people want to remember you. 

You don't want to be washed away in the rain. 

Daily Beast review of Adelle's "Hello" http://www.thedailybeast.com/articles/2015/10/23/why-hello-there-adele-returns-to-break-our-hearts-all-over-again.html