Tuesday, October 27, 2015

Wait- I'm Truly An Introvert?

I'm tired. I get home and want to just have me-time. I use my drive home to reflect and the time at home to relax. 
At first, I thought this was a positive thing. Let's leave work at work and relax to be able to take action all over again the next day. 

But when I think about making time for those I love, it doesn't exist. My friends can tolerate the occasional 'I'll stay in tonight' and my family loves me and understands me enough to 'leave me alone.' 

When I get a family of my own, I can't just tell my significant other or kids to 'go away.' It doesn't work that way, right? 

So thinking about this and a recent conversation I had with a friend, I asked myself- am I really an introvert? 

After completing all of the manager assessments, it relieved me as an extrovert. But am I just acting to get to where I want to go? 

Women need to overcompensate in some cases, especially around achieving executive leadership positions. We speak up in meetings. We are assertive in our questions and answers. We constantly attempt to be present and contribute.

And don't get me wrong - 

I love to talk. I love to be center of attention. I love to be in control.

But is the root of my exhaustion because I'm truly an introvert, living my life as an extrovert?  

These assessments usually reveal a black and white answer. With this recent discovery, I think it's important to acknowledge who I am and where I want to go. From this, I can put triggers in my life to help maintain the brand i am setting for myself. 

Minor changes: 

-Not setting back to back meetings at work to allow time for reflection
-Eating alone and listening to music to decompose 
-Take control of what I want to participate in (and why)

I love a good party and I have a tendency to throw out a comment to a conversation I'm overhearing, but those small things may not make me an extrovert. 

In order for me to succeed as a leader, I need to be balanced at home and at work, and if I'm truly an introvert, how can I be balanced at both if I'm talkative at work and quiet at work? 

As humans, we are not binary. We can have more than one trait at a time. 

Quite a concept. 

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